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Well, I still don’t know exactly how I’m going to divide up my time between work and both Jester’s and my own family these next two days. Maybe Christmas will kindly step outside of space-time for me, or I’ll wake up and find there is a second of me and we can be in separate places at the same time.


None of that is particularly likely…but…one can hope.-_-“



I think that what I will do…*considers*…is…go home after work tomorrow. As much as I’d like to go to church with Jester’s family, I need to make sure I am at home at some point, right? And after they get out of church, (hopefully) Jester will let me know and I’ll head over to his parents’ for a while. Then go home and sleep some so I can be back at work at 8.


Now, if maybe somehow I can get out of work by 4 on Christmas, that will make things a bit better. I’ll be able to go to Jesse’s parents’ again after work for gifts and things, and then eat some dinner…except I’m a little worried about that because dinner at their place is at 530, and even if we leave around 6-615, we won’t be to my house until about 630-645, and I don’t know if I’ll even be able to persuade Jesse to leave by then OR if my family will be patient enough to wait that long. They may well have Christmas without me.:’(



I just want everyone to be happy and I have a looming feeling that somehow this will not be the case and someone will think I’m being rude…either Jester and/or his family because I’ll have to leave so soon, or my own family because I’ll be getting back home so late. Ugh.




Anyway, so that I can go to bed and lie awake feeling anxious about all this…here is another song.




Soultaker by Blutengel


Why? Again, because I liked the beat and the feel of violence behind the music. Also because I was thinking a lot about…ah…Satanism. And I realise that might sound bad, but it would be hard to explain concisely why I was thinking about all that. I promise I am not your worst idea of what Goth is.