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You know those times when you come across things that your loved ones do and you are so baffled that words (nearly) fail you? I think I have run into this again. It exhausts me like nothing else.


I think I will not be able to finish my poem this night, either.

I lost the feel for it and am waiting on a conversation to happen so that I can feel dreadful and finish this attempt at drowning that bit of me.


There will never be enough words to explain.






Quicksilver by The Crüxshadows


Why? I can scarcely say. It was something I found when I was trying to come back to life, and when I thought I could will myself to cut off whatever strands of feeling were still keeping me attached and could potentially still kill me…

Apparently I never managed that, but in listening to this song, at least I felt like I could if I wanted to. (Of course I don’t!)