Had I forgotten to mention that I am an awful sort of person? No? Well, it bears repeating.
Today I saw a status update from someone that was completely out of keeping with what this person usually posts: sad song lyrics. They never do that. They even posted them to someone else. That never happens.
I mustn’t lie…when I saw them, I felt a little flicker of triumph. I was glad to think for a second that something unpleasant may have happened.
I’m not, of course. Of course not. I don’t want that to be the case. Not now. Because, you know…because I try to be decent and sympathetic and all of that. And if it really were bad, well, I’d even have to be angry. Except that I wouldn’t be for once, and would instead be hard at work to hide the fact that I’d be pretty pleased.
On some level I’d feel sorry about that, but it would mostly be sorry for my sake…that I couldn’t be better. Not because I thought that person deserved my sympathy.
Few are the people have dared tell me to my face that they don’t trust me, or that I didn’t deserve to have what was already mine. I can only feel so much for someone like that.