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She brought her family to the theatre to meet me. I thought someone was messing with me when they said she was there, asking for me. And then Randal said she had her family all in the hall waiting for me, and I needed to go

I almost choked.

Already I am awkward at meeting people, but then to be sought out in a highly visible way during the evening shift transition where every single staff member is trying to cram themselves into the little closet that is my office, or is otherwise clamouring for my attention………..ugh!

And it was awkward. I could tell they felt awkward, too…but I felt bad because she seemed really excited to introduce me to them. And I tried to make some little friendly remarks, I think. I don’t actually remember what I said. Something stupid.

Saying words would have been much easier without the accordion and calliope plinking and whooshing away right in the front room of my mind. Sometimes I want to stab myself for letting in all these songs with carnival elements. Especially those accursed accordions! All my fault for getting interested in things like zydeco and apocalyptic folk…
They were going so loud I started getting those ridiculous, flitting thoughts that other people would start to hear the music emanating from my head…

Anyway. I was mortified. And I told Randal so, later, but he said she’d sent someone to find him, first, and that was why he came and got me…
I felt more at ease, knowing I hadn’t actually been singled out.