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Good. So we won’t be showing that stupid movie after all. And I am glad.

Maybe this will underline the joking remarks by my family and coworkers that I am somehow “un-American”, but here’s the thing…
I keep seeing places where people are like, “oh no! the bad guys won! this is a major victory for terrorists!”

Is it though?
Was this film breaking new ground in cinematography? I have the doubts. So many of them. In fact, in everything that I have read and seen about it, the only “groundbreaking” part of it is the fact that it was about assassinating the still-living leader of a country known to be hostile to us.

Well. Now we know what happens when we decide that is what we’d like to do.

Did that film need to be seen by the masses? *shrug* Who am I to decide what people should find entertaining. Would it have been life-changing? Hell no. Especially if the previews did what comedy previews so often do, and show the funniest parts of the movie before the release anyway.

But guess what! Guess what is super American about the way the decision was made!

They (Sony) really didn’t have a huge choice but to cancel the release of the film because the big chain movie houses refused to show it. And that is incredibly American.

Why do I think so? Mmm…because money. $$$

Theatre chains (forget about any other aspect of our industry) are concerned that we would lose money. For a number of reasons.

1. Guests being too afraid to come to our theatres during a key money-making time of the year for us. We don’t work 365 for nothing. It’s how we make the most money, by capitalizing on when people–large groups of them…families with young people who have disposable income–have free time to come spend a few hours stuffing their faces and watching a movie. We can’t lose out on that, given what a bad last two years the movie industry has had.

2. Cyber attacks on theatres showing the film. Because even if nobody is injured, people’s financial information could be stolen, studio’s information could be stolen, employee information could be stolen…business operations could be impeded in other ways (are you aware that projectors could be hacked? we kind of can’t operate our businesses without them) that would make the holiday season that much more chaotic and overall unprofitable for us.

3. Physical attacks. Not necessarily from the organization that is issuing the threats…but…come on. If you’re reading this, you’ve been on the internet long enough to know what kinds of people we have in America already who are crazy and would love to get in on some mayhem at a movie theatre. We don’t need that.
Do you feel confident that my minimum-wage high school and college kids and retirees are going to save your ass if something happens at our theatre? NO WAY! We don’t train them for that because guess what? We sell tickets and make popcorn. We are not the police. We are not the government. We are not the military. We don’t save lives and protect freedom and American values. Basically, this isn’t our problem.
(Showing movies about Captain America does not make us like him, just in case you had some trouble figuring that out.)

My fiancé posted something on FB, reflecting what I said in my last post…and I am pissed at the people who commented, thinking we should have gone ahead and shown the movie anyway.

Bro, fuck you. You only say that because you actually don’t have to worry about anything happening. Not working there, you can sit back at home and watch as things unfold so you can assess the situation before you ever buy your ticket.

When I left my theatre today, our CEO had sent an email to say they were evaluating the situation themselves…and after I left, bam. Word arrived that we would not show it. So that means that either A) there is information that you don’t know yet, indicating that maybe it really was a potentially unsafe decision (because guess what! I don’t think that the government shares everything with us right when it happens…and with good reason, given how many crazy, stupid people are here in this country–remember, you’ve been on the internet, so you can’t not know about them!), or B) the information that the higher-ups in our industry are being given is incomplete enough that–even if there was no imminent threat–they did not feel comfortable green-lighting the movie.

That said, I do hope that when you go out to see a film that is being played this holiday season, that you will be kind to the employees. We’re just like you. We like what you like (well, except for me, maybe), and we are just as concerned with getting through the rough patches of this season as you are. So, you know…try to keep your patriotic hatred of us to yourselves, thanks.

(Oh, and try to get the popcorn in your MOUTH and not on the FLOOR, since a fair number of the ADULTS who are saying we’re cowardly and un-American are also not able to fucking feed themselves without dropping half of it. Trust me. I have cleaned enough theatres to know.)

And here, as an unrelated footnote, is my next song.


Again. So poppy. So much sparkle. So much unrequited love!
I liked singing along with this one too much, I think. That is the only reason why it’s here…no deep, personal connection or anything…just catchy lyrics.